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Apr 2, 2013

Moving from being a “Woman in Ministry” to a “Woman who Ministers”

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I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what it means to be a woman in ministry. This comes, of course, with the presupposition that women are called by God into every facet of ministry – something I firmly believe in. So let’s not get into that theological debate, m’kay?

I’ve been thinking about what this…thing…is. I grew up always wanting to be in the ministry. But in my formative years I never saw a woman in a full-time ministry position. Plenty of pastor’s wives. Lots of Sunday School teachers who were ladies. But not a single woman in vocational ministry. In fact, I don’t believe I met one before I was in my 30′s. I did have a couple of female college professors in Bible college, but I never saw them in a church setting. It would seem I didn’t have a lot of women to use as an example of what a woman in ministry should be doing. What it looks like.

Have you always wanted to be a woman in ministry? Or are you one of the many who never, ever, ever wanted to be in ministry?

As I pondered this, I realized this simple truth: the women who ministered to my own wanting soul, who taught me about spiritual disciplines, about loving the unlovable, weren’t “women in ministry” at all. They were faithful “lay people,” good neighbors, and generous friends. Women who took care of me while my parents worked. Who brought our family food in times of need. Who took me out for coffee and allowed me to vent in frustration. Those gentle spirits who whispered God’s affirming words to me. Who understood that, through friendship, Grace abounds. These women didn’t work in churches. They worked as doctors, and business owners. They were homemakers, and accountants; personal trainers and paralegals. One was an army wife-probably the closest to understanding the often-lonely life of a woman in ministry. These women taught me that Pastor/Preacher…or not, I am a woman who is called to minister.

Pastor’s wife or woman in ministry…or not – you are a woman called to minister. Sunday school teacher or not, dear wife/daughter/sister/friend – you are called to minister.

Our neighbors, our co-workers, our friends are counting on us to use our God-given gifts to bring His hope to them. Our families and friends are depending on us to use our uniquely feminine voices to speak words of life into them. Words of wisdom that comes from above to their brokenness. The God who created us, in all our girly glory, has released us to feed the hungry, care for the sick, love the unlovely, and guide the lost.

He has invited each and every one of us into ministry. Even you…the gal who never, ever, ever, in a million years, wanted to be a “woman in ministry.” :)

Chew on that and let me know what you think…

Be Blessed,

JulieAnn

Filed Under: Everyday Encouragement, Living as a Christian, This Crazy Life Called "Ministry" ·
Mar 16, 2013

Do You Have a History of Failure…Like Me?

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I remember my first speaking engagement. I was asked to speak for a women’s tea for a sweet little church in the mountains. My primary contact didn’t give me a lot of instruction as to what she was hoping for. I didn’t ask very many clarifying questions – just planned a bible study that I thought was really good and would work well.

When I arrived, I found out not only was I woefully overdressed (I wore heels. WHY would ANYONE wear heels to a cabin in the mountains??), but I realized I also did not come prepared for the kind of event this was intended to be. I panicked.

I changed my content on the fly. It was awful. I will never forget the glazed over eyes trying desperately to keep up with me. And the polite “Amen” after my closing prayer. It.Was.Awful. And then they generously took an offering. A very good offering. Which I didn’t deserve. It was just plain awful.

Speaking

You’d have thought I had learned. But it happened again last week. I was asked to come speak to an all-boys lock-in for my church. It just needed to be a simple devotion. For boys. Ages 5-17. (Yeesh!) I prepared. Spent time working on it. And…it was awful. Just plain awful. {sigh}

I’ve been in ministry for nearly 20 years. I work really hard for any opportunity I have to teach about the love of God. I don’t take it lightly. But sometimes I don’t get it right. Like last week. And plenty of other times before that. I feel very disappointed in myself when this happens. I mutter to myself. Dwell on it. And don’t let it go very well. It becomes personal. But last night as I was laying in bed replaying the night and teaching the lesson the *right* way to my invisible audience, God was faithful to remind me of this:

There are plenty of individuals in the Bible who didn’t always get it right. Who struggled to complete the mission God wanted them to accomplish. Who doubted God’s calling. Who found it hard to see themselves through God’s eyes. Can you name a few? How about…

Abraham & Sarah in Genesis 18

10 Then the Lord said, “You can be sure that I will return to you about this time next year. Your wife Sarah will have a son.” Sarah was listening at the entrance to the tent behind him. 11 Abraham and Sarah were already very old. Sarah was too old to have a baby. 12 So she laughed to herself. She thought, “I’m worn out, and my husband is old. Can I really know the joy of having a baby?” 13 Then the Lord said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh? Why did she say, ‘Will I really have a baby, now that I am old?’ 14 Is anything too hard for me?

Moses in Exodus 4

10 Moses spoke to the Lord. He said, “Lord, I’ve never been a good speaker. And I haven’t gotten any better since you spoke to me. I don’t speak very well at all.” 11 The Lord said to him, “Who makes a man able to talk? Who makes him unable to hear or speak? Who makes him able to see? Who makes him blind? It is I, the Lord. 12 Now go. I will help you speak. I will teach you what to say.”

Peter in Matthew 14

29 “Come,” Jesus said. So Peter got out of the boat. He walked on the water toward Jesus. 30 But when Peter saw the wind, he was afraid. He began to sink. He cried out, “Lord! Save me!” 31 Right away Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “Your faith is so small!” he said. “Why did you doubt me?”

Thomas in John 20

27 Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here. See my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.”

Does your fear of failure keep you from stepping into the unknown for God? Or believing His ability? Or does your history of failure make you want to quit trying? Yeah…me too. But I want to challenge you to push those doubts aside! Pull yourself up by your bootstraps, my dear sisters in ministry! This is not what God has called us to. He does not want us to listen to the enemy of our souls. We are reminded over and over in His word: God has confidence in you! He’s taking you and molding you through each experience, positive and negative, into the woman He envisions you to be!

“Then you will know that I am the LORD. Those who hope in me will not be disappointed.” Isaiah 49:23

“See, I am doing a new thing!” “I am working all things together for good, because you love me and are called according to my purpose.” “All things are possible to [she] who believes.” Isa. 43:19; Rom. 8:28; Mark 9:23
Have a great weekend of ministry my friends!
Be Blessed,
JulieAnn
Filed Under: Everyday Encouragement, This Crazy Life Called "Ministry" ·
Jan 1, 2013

Have You Written Your Plans In Ink or In Pencil?

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As I lay in bed wide awake last night, energized from the night’s activities, I began to contemplate my 2012 and what 2013 might look like.

I’ve enjoyed reading my friends’ facebook statuses, as well as several blog posts about the last year. I spoke to so many last night as we contemplated what the new year might hold for us.

As I began to pray again about my hopes and dreams and ask that God would direct my paths, He dropped in my heart quite a large question: Have you written your plans in ink or in pencil?

Some of us are born list-makers. We make lists for all kinds of great reasons: the steps we want to take to become healthier; the steps we want to take to improve our relationship with our spouse; the steps we want to take to achieve our dreams; or just simply, the steps we need to take to get through our day intact!

For others, they fight lists. Hate ‘em to the core of their being. Roll their eyes at us “planners.” But even these free-spirits makes plans.

Have you written your plans in ink or in pencil?

When a plan’s been made, how open are you to those plans being changed?  If we as believers are asked whether we’re open to God changing our plans, our answer is almost always “Yes!”. But do our actions show this to be true? If I look at my life since becoming a believer I can see times when I have clung to a plan or challenge once it was made.

Afterall, there were good reasons I made that plan, right?

Dwight D. Eisenhower, 34th President of the United States, former five-star general in the US Army and the Supreme Commander of Allied Forces during D-Day once said, “In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable.”

Uh… this man led armies through highly complicated and pivotal historic events – and he thinks “plans are useless?”

I’ve learned repeatedly that when God interrupts my plans, He has something in mind that I don’t. And let’s be honest, His plans are always better than mine. It’s often difficult to see where the next step will take us, but our faith is, indeed, like a muscle. As we exercise it, it grows.

At these times, it’s critical to trust God and obey. Frankly, it is easier when He allows us to continue on our path. But when He asks us to change our direction, to go a new way, to shift our focus, it gets difficult.

Well, 2012 has been a year of changing direction. God has been asking me to go a new way – to shift my focus. Specifically regarding the Ministry Momma community. In September, God dropped a ministry opportunity in my lap. In case you have not heard, I’ve become the Family Life Pastor of a great congregation in Dublin, Ohio. On a weekly basis I get the opportunity to minister to over 150 kids and their parents. I love this new challenge in my life! It is incredibly fun, awe-inspiring, and…time-consuming.

My desire is to give my best energy to this new ministry. It is also my desire that I remain keenly focused on my own family, constantly striving to maintain our own family dynamic and balance. Thus my specific focus on Ministry Momma will have to be paused.

Women in ministry and pastor’s wives will continue to be my heartbeat. I very much desire continued involvement in the lives of women in ministry – encouraging, loving, supporting, and being a sounding board. I will still be available for mentoring women. I will still post from time to time. The blog isn’t going away. But God has asked that I be willing to erase the next line in my plan and pencil in a new item according to His plan.

And I believe His plans are big and beyond my imagination! His word tells me so in Jeremiah 29:

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

So until next post – whenever that may be – my prayer for each of you wonderful women in ministry is that the “Plan B’s” in your life would be the blessing they’re intended to be. That as you are making plans, God would direct your steps. That you would keep your eyes and hearts focused on the One who called you – knowing He is faithful. That you would be open to the paths that God puts before you and that He would light your path each step of the way.

With love and prayers for your journey!

JulieAnn

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Filed Under: Everyday Encouragement, Home Matters, Living as a Christian, Raising PKs, This Crazy Life Called "Ministry" ·
Dec 17, 2012

Christmas

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I haven’t posted in awhile. I’ve been busy.

sunset 1

SERIOUSLY busy.

resort lawn

It was rough. Spending a week in a tropical location. No kids. No agenda. My hubs all to myself.

watching sunset 1

So wonderful. And refreshing.

And then we came home to…Christmas. Specifically, Christmas celebrations (of course that’s plural!) at church. Parties. 8 straight days in a row.

christmas party

Christmas program. 3 nights a week, 2 weekends in a row, plus the kid’s program (WITH dress rehearsal!).

Christmas program

Christmas.

It’s quite possibly the most dreaded, insanely busy period of a ministry family’s year. May I say, with a triumphant fist pump, that I have (nearly) survived it!

How are you holding up?

Filed Under: This Crazy Life Called "Ministry" ·
Nov 16, 2012

Will You Make an Impact?

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Reblogged from Ministry Momma:

Think about this:

  • Martin Luther was born into a family of trading class (middle class) background.  On October 31, 1546, Luther nailed his 95 Theses to the door of the Wittenberg Cathedral sparking the beginning of the Reformation - the beginning of Christianity becoming the people's religion.
  • John Wycliff is known to be the major translator of the Bible from its once elite translation of Latin, usable only by the most educated priests of the church, to the language of the common people, making it readable by all who could read, giving us the priviledge to read God's word for ourselves.

Read more… 533 more words

A couple days ago I tweeted: “Gandhi was one person. Martin Luther King was one person. Mother Theresa was one person. Why can’t you be one person?”   Today I read a post by Steven Furtick about how "Obedience Creates Opportunity."   This made me think of this post I wrote a few years ago: "Will You Make an Impact?"   Where are you today? Are you making an impact where you are planted or are you seeking greener pastures? Read this. Mull this. Apply this, my friends. Blessings!
Filed Under: Home Matters ·
Nov 9, 2012

Spinning Plates

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Reblogged from Ministry Momma:

Ever been to one of those stage shows where there is someone trying to get as many plates spinning at one time as possible? Usually those plates are on top of gravity-defying poles, or stacked taller than a human. Watching those shows leaves you breathless and wondering how they do it? How do they keep up? How do they get them all balanced correctly?

Read more… 415 more words

I'm reposting this blog I wrote in 2008 because it's so appropriate to my life right now. Like so many people these days, the economy has caught up with our family and I've had to return to work to help our family. Let's be clear - I LOVE my new position. But still...I find myself spinning plates more than ever. Just as I am working to regularly find that place of rest, to stop spinning the plates (every once and a while, at least), and allow my Heavenly Father to speak peace to my life, I pray the same for you! Peace to you, my dear ministry mommas! Have an excellent weekend of ministry! --JulieAnn
Filed Under: Home Matters ·
Oct 29, 2012

The Immature Marriage {Marriage Monday}

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You’re only a kid once, but you can be immature for a lifetime. The same is true for our marriages. They can be mature, or immature, based more on our choices than on time.

Two characteristics of maturity in your marriage are generosity and forgiveness. In the mature marriage, the wife says, “I’m going to overlook my husband’s top 10 problems. Whenever he offends me I’ll say, ‘Good thing that’s in the top ten!’” The husband sacrifices a golfing excursion to give his wife time to relax and regroup without children around.

Generally, we start dating in a giving mode: ignoring faults, excusing irritations, and affording grace to our loved one. After the vows are spoken, however, it’s not at all uncommon to move into receiving mode, adopting an unhealthy “What have you done for me lately?” immature attitude.

The Apostle Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 14:11 to “put away childish things,”

So how do children act?

  1. Undependable, unsteady.
  2. Talk too much about nothing. It takes us three years to learn to talk and decades to learn how to be quiet.
  3. Curious. Children always have to be involved in everybody else’s business.
  4. Using words carelessly … i.e hurtful joking, provoking, contentiousness, grumbling and complaining.
  5. Mine, mine, mine and me, me, me … totally self-absorbed, not considering anyone else’s feelings or circumstances.
  6. Petty.  How many of our complaints in our marriage (and those of our church members) are petty, minor gripes that could be overlooked?

If you recognize areas of immaturity in your marriage, determine to “grow up.” As someone has said, the greatest gift we can give our children is to demonstrate a loving relationship between husband and wife. How much more true is that of our congregations and those to whom we are called to minister?

Filed Under: Home Matters ·
Oct 20, 2012

Who is the Proverbs 31 Woman?

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Today I am over at the blog, Question Your Doubts, talking about the Proverbs 31 woman. Here’s an excerpt:

In Christian circles, we use the description found in Proverbs 31 as our primary example of “the perfect woman.” Unfortunately, though, we are so intimidated by the passage that we never pursue that goal purposefully. So instead we do with her what we do with so many others – we compare and find ourselves lacking.

She seems to be the unattainable. And if you’re like me – full of big dreams, a strong personality, ample will, and a desire to change the world – this chapter might inspire fear in your heart. You might begin to wonder because the majority of this passage doesn’t sound like it matches the dreams you have for your life. Don’t be indicted by the ways you feel you don’t fit the Proverbs 31 description.

To read the rest, click here.

In the meantime, have a blessed weekend of ministry my dear sisters in the Lord’s work!

Filed Under: Home Matters ·
Oct 15, 2012

You Prayed for This {Marriage Monday}

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He spoke to me between one child’s bouts of retching and another’s temper tantrum.

I had left my full-time ministry position along-side my husband to stay home with our kids. We were, for the first time in our married life, in a position to be able to do this. We had one school-aged child, and two still too young for school. I was going to get to stay home and be their primary influence for these critical formative years. I was happy…maybe?

I told my husband all the time: “I didn’t go to Bible college to find you. I went to answer God’s call on my life. I just happened to run into you on the journey.” I didn’t mean it to sound unkind or unloving. I just wanted him to understand that I went to college to fulfill my life’s passion of full-time ministry, just like he did.

I have always known God was calling me to ministry (even though I strayed from that plan for a few years in high school). I have always known I wanted to be a wife and mother. For some reason, the thought never occurred to me that those two desires would conflict, maybe even collide.

As I sat in the middle of my stay-at-home life, missing my ministry life, I was unhappy. Probably even a little angry.

“You prayed for this,” whispered the Lord.

Say what?!?

“You prayed for this. Back when you first prayed for your salvation, when you prayed that you would know Me. And then all those times you prayed that I would work My will in and through you, and be able to use you for My glory. This is an answer to your prayer.”

My stomach heaved again.

I had become Jonah, sitting on the hillside overlooking Nineveh, having a pity-party because God did what He promised, but I didn’t like the results.

God’s question to Jonah was His question to me: “Have you any right to be angry?” (Jon 4:4)

I had prayed those things.

That gentle reminder has come back to me repeatedly over the past 10 years. At times when my husband is “virtually absent” during his prayer and study time, when he’s literally absent while on the road in ministry, and I’m busy cleaning the bathroom after yet another bout of retching, all while trying not to have my own tempter tantrum.

Are you angry because the church or ministry takes away so much of your husband’s time and attention? Or that home life and children keeps you from the work of ministry that you also long for?

May I humbly suggest that you consider what you’ve prayed for, and ask yourself (and God) if you have a “right” to be angry.

When you’ve calmed down, put your loneliness and your hurt feelings in the hands of your loving Father and let Him minister His love and grace into your heart. I can’t guarantee everything will suddenly be great, fabulous, and wonderful, , but I can guarantee you this:

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. Ecc. 3:11-12

There is no need that you have as a woman, as a wife, or as that most unusual and unique of creatures—a pastor’s wife—that your Maker is unable to meet. Trust Him. He loves you.

Filed Under: Everyday Encouragement, Home Matters ·
Oct 10, 2012

Friendship in Ministry Can be a Double-Edged Sword: 5 Traits to Look for in a True Friend

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The last few weeks have been hard. Yesterday was especially hard. I hate to say it but women can be snarky. VERY snarky. And our Christianity doesn’t exempt us from this tendency.

When it hits, it hurts. Makes this hard-as-nails city girl feel a little like crying.

Friendship in ministry can be a double-edged sword.

In my nearly 20 years of ministry, I have learned that I need friends. But, as with many other pastor’s wives, one of my biggest struggles with this ministry-life is actually allowing someone close enough to be my friend because it hasn’t always fared well. I’ll never know why it is particularly difficult for us ministry women to find genuine friendships. But it is.

Ever heard this phrase?

Friends come, Friends go, But a true friend is there to watch you grow.

So what exactly is a “true friend?”  It’s something I’ve been asking a lot lately. Here’s 5 things I’ve come up with:

1. Christian Friends Love Sacrificially

John 15:13  (NIV)
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.

Jesus is the supreme example of a true Christian friend, isn’t he? The love he exemplified for us is sacrificial, never selfish. He demonstrated it through the humble service of washing the disciples’ feet, and especially when he laid down his life on the cross.

If we choose our friends based only on what they have to offer, we won’t discover the blessings of a genuine friendship. By valuing your friend’s needs above your own, you’ll be on your way to loving like Jesus.

2. Christian Friends Accept Unconditionally

Proverbs 17:17
A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

We discover the best of friendships with those to whom we’ve been honest and sincere and who know and accept our weaknesses and imperfections.

And if we are easily offended or hold on to bitterness, we’ll have a hard time making friends. No one is perfect (whew – am I ever an imperfect creation!!). We all make mistakes from time to time. If we take a truthful look at ourselves, we’ll admit that we bear some of the blame when things go wrong in a friendship. A good friend is quick to ask forgiveness and ready to be forgiving.

3. Christian Friends Trust Completely

Proverbs 18:24
A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

You’ve read this proverb a gazillion times, I’m sure. But have you looked at it from this angle: this proverb reveals the interesting truth that a true Christian friend is trustworthy, for sure, but it also emphasizes that we should only expect to share complete trust with a few loyal friends. Trusting too easily can lead to ruin, so be careful about putting your confidence in a mere companion. Over time our true Christian friends will prove their trustworthiness by sticking closer than a brother (or sister).

4. Christian Friends Keep Healthy Boundaries

1 Corinthians 13:4
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy …

If you feel smothered in a friendship, something is wrong. If you feel used, something is also wrong. Recognizing what’s best for someone and giving that person space are signs of a healthy relationship. We should never let a friend come between us and our spouse. A true Christian friend will wisely avoid intruding and recognize your need to maintain other relationships.

5. Christian Friends Give Mutual Edification

Proverbs 27:6
Wounds from a friend can be trusted …

True Christian friends will build each other up emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Friends like to be together simply because it feels good. We receive strength, encouragement, and love. We talk, we cry, we listen. But at times we also have to say the difficult things our friend needs to hear. Yet, because of our shared trust and acceptance, we are the one person who can impact our friend’s heart, for we know how to deliver the hard message with truth and grace. I believe this is what Proverbs 27:17 means when it says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.”

If you have been on the receiving end of snarkiness like me, be encouraged: you’re not alone (HA!). And if you don’t have lots of close friends, don’t be too hard on yourself. Remember, true Christian friendships are rare treasures. They take time to nurture, but in the process we grow more Christlike.

Filed Under: Everyday Encouragement, Living as a Christian, This Crazy Life Called "Ministry" ·
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